Giving Compass' Take:

• Here are some thoughts and questions to reflect on when having sensitive conversations and helpful tips on gaining a deeper understanding by hearing others' perspectives. 

• How can donors benefit from this type of reflection when thinking about pursuing charitable giving interests? Have you examined your perceptions on issues such as racial justice and COVID-19 recovery?

• Read about white fragility and racial equity to find out what is stopping these kinds of conversations. 

In the last several weeks, several leaders have reached out and asked me how to hold conversations about racial relations that will deepen understanding without creating offense.

These types of queries are important to consider given the current tensions many are experiencing. Their questions caused me to reflect upon a conversation that I had recently while traveling home.

I had the opportunity to sit next to a gentleman who struck up a conversation about COVID-19 and the challenges it presents. Eventually the conversation turned to the civil unrest and racial tensions within our country.

In order to talk about any sensitive topic, be it racial injustice, LGBTQ rights, political differences or wearing a mask, we must examine our thinking, challenge our perceptions, gain an understanding of others’ perspectives and make a conscious choice about the way we will respond to and treat one another.

Before holding these types of sensitive conversations, each of us must explore our personal mental models and come to understand how our thinking affects our behavior. Only then are we prepared to reach out to others and begin to explore their experiences. Here are some reflection questions to help you do just that.

  1. Are you uncomfortable?
  2. How do you recognize what you think?
  3. Do you challenge the accuracy of your thinking?
  4. Can you separate yourself from your feelings?
  5. Do you seek out opportunities to obtain the perspectives of others?
  6. Do you seek first to understand and then to be understood?
  7. Are you really interested in even understanding or solving the current challenge or problem?

Read the full article about navigating sensitive conversations by John R. Stoker at SmartBrief.